Hacking the TSA: Exploiting my...

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I did it. I gamed the system to skip the security line. And I will strike again. It took a big chunk of my dignity, but after...

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My friend was just added to th...

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This one is serious. Everything here is serious, but I’m not even going to attempt to be irreverent. My friend tried to board a...

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TSA freaks out over my Starbuc...

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Idiocy reaches new levels as the TSA goes on Red Alert over my Starbucks mug. Someone, for the love of god, please tell me how I can...

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The time they refused to pack ...

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The time an agent refused to pack my luggage back up, and I went Alex Jones on her. Until the day the TSA gets destroyed in court,...

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I figured out why the TSA sets...

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When it hit me what they’re trying to do with their obnoxious “security audits” at the gate. The horribly pathetic...

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How I mess with airline staff ...

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Something very strange happens at the gate about 75% of the time I fly. It is clearly related to being on The List. But I...

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Drama at the gate: What happen...

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After TSA scrutiny, there’s still have a couple of cruel jokes left for the jetsetting terrorist. One is the “approach...

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The thing I carry everywhere t...

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This $100 item comes highly recommended if you’re trying to mess with the TSA. About six months ago I got this thing called...

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Counter-harrassing the TSA: My...

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My girlfriend gets me a comb disguised as a switchblade knife, the TSA hates it. I think it started when we watched the 80s classic...

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TSA agent tries to make up rul...

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TSA agent tries to tell me I can’t board a flight. I laugh at him. He scurries off like a little bitch. A consistent theme...

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Fighting sycophantic, TSA-lovi...

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The scene: LAX security. The time: 30 minutes ago. This is fresh in my memory so I’m going to type this out as fast as I...

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What a terrorist’s airli...

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I’ve done a lot of talking about the “SSSS” on the boarding pass that denotes a traveler as a security threat, but...

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My shoes tested positive for e...

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To celebrate September 11th, another story about a convicted terrorist (me) flying on airplanes. Denver should know better....

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The TSA agent who likes the Be...

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For the first time, I’m not going to make fun of the TSA. I’m going to celebrate them. Or one of them. (It won’t...

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Flying Internationally as a co...

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In part three of my “Globetrotting Jetsetting Terrorist TSA Follies” series, I return from Paris and find the TSA...

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